With The Stars:
Mary Tyler Moore,
Dick Van Dyke,
Doris Day,
John Denver,
and Rich Little!
Recorded at Case de Burgener's, 1/11/09, in front of a live studio audience.
Producer's Note: Game 2 went a little slower than 1 due to the untimely absence of special guest star, from Tv's Fantasy Island,
Herve Villachaize.
What he was doing that evening remains a mystery even now; although some of the cast has worked up a few possibilities. That's for another time.. We at W.A.Y. Inc strive to produce high quality entertainment, but when little bastard midgets go on "dates" without canceling a prior engagement, well, there isn't much we can do about it...except insult them mercilessly and watch badly written variety shows from the 70's afterwards.. Ahem.. Excuse us. The censors apparently took the night off too. Pity.
We apologize for any inconvenience this may have incured...
But for now, we present the top ten moments of Game 2... On we go!
1. "Chris Rutt"
*R.L: Montana man who patented Aunt Jemima pancake mix.
MTM: First Briton to fly solo across the English channel.
JD: A young biologist who studied the mating habits of large, wild ruminents.
DVD: Invented the skateboard in 1977 by attaching wheels to his snowboard.
DD: A British glam-rock star who dared Ozzy Osbourne to bite the head off a bat.
2. "Hips, Hips, Hooray"
JD: A musical celebration of the full-figured woman.
*DVD: A highschool hoola hoop competition has the local girls gunning for the prize of the kiss from the town teen idol.
MTM: Two salesmen are hired to sell flavoured lipstick to a beauty parlour chain.
DD: A movie about a high school cheerleading squad and their seduction of the principal.
RL: Octogenarian Milly Fielding wins the Guinness World Record for the most consecutive hula hooping in 1966.
3. "Boomkin"
MTM: Piece on a small aerial lift used to raise and lower the basket.
DD: The next generation boomerang exclusively sold in Australia.
RL: Russian word for lost nuclear missiles.
*JD: The short beam projecting from the bow of a ship.
DVD: An African vegetable similar in flavor to the turnip.
4. "P.O.O.F.F."
*DVD: Pennslyvania's Official Operators Fellowship Fund
JD: Professional Ooglers of Female Figures
RL: Pacific Ontario Oncology Financial Foundation
DD: Proof Of Otherworldly Force Fields
MTM: Practical Olympic Officials Of Fried Food
5. " In Redwood City, CA, it is against the law to fry..."
RL: Baby raccoons in the winter.
JD: Onions without a permit
*DVD: Gravy.
DD: An egg on the sidewalk simply to see if it will.
MTM: Dog meat in public.
6. "Tegestologist"
*DD: A collector of cardboard beer coasters
RL: Makes puppets out of taxidermist clients.
JD: A scientist who studies the growth of tea-making plants.
DVD: One who studes the layers of Earth between the crust and the core.
MTM: An expert in fault lines appearing in granite.
7. "Phase Four"
DD: The world is overrun by terrorists who have taken over in 3 phases. All that's left is phase 4...total nuclear obliteration.
*DVD: Killer ants get loose and turn on the people trying to get rid of them.
JD: A documentary about the spread of a new card game across the planet.
RL: A nuclear physicist builds a tinkertoy car that runs on the methane emissions of his mutated hamster, Charlie.
MTM: A popular younger brother endeavors to improve older brother's dating life through a series of phases.
8. "Jesse Warren"
*JD: Kansas roofing contractor whose car was made famous when it was stolen by Bonnie & Clyde.
DD: Has eaten a Mcdonald's Big Mac every day since April 1976.
DVD: Robbed 30 Trains in the 1800's.
MTM: Hotel Tycoon from the 1920's. Killed by the mob during a land dispute.
RL: Ate Eego waffles before his lethal injection in 1972.
9. "N.B.T.A."
DD: Northern Board Of Travel in the Atlantic
RL: National Broadcasters Of Tibetan Apes
*JD: Northern Bass & Trout Association
DVD: National Boston Tea Association
MTM: National Baton Twirling Association
10. "Expresso Bongo"
*DD: The semi-interesting story of the rise to fame and fortune of a struggling bongo player and his fast talking agent.
DVD: Two Columbians are dodging customs agents as they try to smuggle a plant made from cross breeding coffee and marijuana into the U.S.
RL: Possessed tango dancing cheerleaders from outer space enslave men with their hypnotic dancing in this lighthearted 80's comedy.
MTM: The express train in Africa gets taken over by racist fanatics.
JD: A beach musical starring Annette Funicello and the Monkees.
...And that's the way the cookie crumbles. Thanks for watching, folks.
But before we go, as always, a token of our gratitude for not flipping channels during commerical breaks...
Bonus Games!
.1: "The Day The Fish Came Out"
*JD: Scifi satire starring Candice Bergen about a plant that crash lands on a Mediterranean Island.
MTM: Johnny "The Fish" Jerroni makes his debut as a wrestler.
DVD: A touching story about a boy who befriends a fish head found on the beach.
JL: Global warming. 50 years have passed. You've just pissed off the wrong piranhas.
DD: A film about the first creatures to evolve from the sea.
.2: "Cracked Nuts"
MTM: 21 year old men spend their time and money on cars and women.
*DD: A country bumpkin wins cash in a contest but almost loses it to a fast talking robot.
JD: The humorous adventures of a six escapees from an asylum.
RL: Bernard Carson, 38, has been institutionalized after shooting Baryshinikov during a performance of The Nutcracker.
DVD: A documentation on the treatment of the mentally ill in the Sunny Side Missouri Asylum.
Thanks again, and be sure to join us next time for another exciting edition of Balderdash!
And, as per usual,
Mary Tyler Moore: C2
Dick Van Dyke: C1
Doris Day: Whoville
John Denver: Dick
Rich Little: Jimmy B.
No comments:
Post a Comment